菠萝包
我本来是想买奶油豆沙菠萝包的,结果你说没有,你说只有奶油红豆菠萝包,我想奶油红豆菠萝包应该和奶油豆沙菠萝包差不多吧,红豆吃到肚子里迟早也要变成豆沙,这是物理变化不是化学变化,做人不能因为过于苛求形式而忽略本质,再说奶油豆沙菠萝包和奶油红豆菠萝包价钱上一样,那就不用再计较了,就买奶油红豆菠萝包吧!所以就买了你的奶油红豆菠萝包,一回到家就迫不及待地撕掉包装纸咬了一口,没有见到红豆,又咬了一口,还是没有见到红豆,继续咬继续咬,接二连三地咬啊咬啊咬,就是看不到红豆,红豆呢?where is 红豆?就这样在寻找红豆的过程中我不知不觉地把这个巴掌大的菠萝包咬完了,我还没有来得及享受到吃早点的快感,早点就被我吃掉了,我甚至忽略了你卖给我的奶油红豆菠萝包除了没有红豆之外是不是连奶油都没有掺,或者根本连菠萝包都不是,也许你卖给我的只是一个干巴巴的白面馒头而已,还收了我两块钱!你辜负了我对你的信任,践踏了我对现实社会寄予的美好希望和情感,你让我从此对夹心类食品噤若寒蝉,生活减少了一种乐趣,那么有一种幸福我就永远无法染指,这不是用两块钱能换回来的,这是用三块钱都换不回来的,就好像我永远都看不到你奶油红豆菠萝包里面的红豆一样,你也永远看不到我的悲伤和失望,但不一样的是,我的悲伤和失望是事实存在的,而你的红豆呢?你奶油红豆菠萝包里面的红豆呢?给我个交待,你今天必须要给我个交待:一个合理的解释,一个羞愧的道歉,一个战战兢兢的鞠躬,割地赔款,然后逃之夭夭,你选,随便你选,你不要脸红,呼吸不要那么急促,别冲我瞪眼,告诉你轻易别和我比瞪眼,因为我眼睛瞪起来比你的圆,也别叉腰,也别怪我冲你叉腰,我是没办法,我双手自然下垂的时候就落在腰上,腰以下的地方我够不着,我总不能天天把手搁在胸脯上走路,现在别和我计较这个,现在不是你和我计较的时候而是我和你计较的时候,你说什么?你说大点声,但是也别嚷嚷,什么?!我看不到红豆是因为我嘴巴比菠萝包还大?!!
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